Not Guilty of Love
Laughter, lively conservations, and jazz spewing from the surround-sound speakers couldn’t drown out Malcolm’s trademark entrance. The doorbell buzzed twice, paused, and buzzed again. As if knowing Parke’s door would be unlocked, Malcolm waltzed into the living room.His presence demanded attention. Without asking, he got it. Hallison’s heartbeat accelerated. It had been months since Hallison had seen him. She had purposely avoided him when she visited Parke and Cheney. A few times they had come face-to-face, but Hallison had a ready-made excuse to flee. “Oh. Hi, Malcolm. I’m on my way out. I don’t want to be late for church,” she would say, reciting a practiced line.His speechless response was also pre-set with an amused expression, challenging her truthfulness. Twice, she had driven to the church and sat in the parking lot, repenting for the fib. She couldn’t keep running away from her temptation, so she refused to bolt this time.Months ago, she had invited Malcolm to what she considered their final intimate dinner. Surrounded by the restaurant’s romantic ambiance, Hallison sobbed silently as she placed the four-carat diamond ring back into his palm with a shaky hand.Begrudgingly, Malcolm accepted more than the ring. It symbolized their engagement had officially terminated and their couple status had been dissolved.Malcolm wasn’t the one who got away, but was instead the man God instructed Hallison to give away. The Lord had issued the ultimatum: Malcolm, the love of her life, or Him, the One who gave her life.Women would be waiting on the sidelines, ready to steal Malcolm’s affections with a no-option-for-his-release clause in a relationship contract. On the outside, Hallison felt she was a fool to let a good man go, but spiritually, as a self-proclaimed backslider, her salvation clock was ticking. To her, the decision was a smart move, one she couldn’t explain, except to a few church friends. God had let her know loud and clear she had to first deny herself of her fleshly desires, pick up her cross, and follow Him.How long would I have to fast until I would be spiritually strong enough to quench my craving for Malcolm’s voice, his touch, and his smothering eyes? she questioned God as she controlled her breathing to keep Malcolm from seeing how much he affected her.
Laughter, lively conservations, and jazz spewing from the surround-sound speakers couldn’t drown out Malcolm’s trademark entrance. The doorbell buzzed twice, paused, and buzzed again. As if knowing Parke’s door would be unlocked, Malcolm waltzed into the living room.His presence demanded attention. Without asking, he got it. Hallison’s heartbeat accelerated. It had been months since Hallison had seen him. She had purposely avoided him when she visited Parke and Cheney. A few times they had come face-to-face, but Hallison had a ready-made excuse to flee. “Oh. Hi, Malcolm. I’m on my way out. I don’t want to be late for church,” she would say, reciting a practiced line.His speechless response was also pre-set with an amused expression, challenging her truthfulness. Twice, she had driven to the church and sat in the parking lot, repenting for the fib. She couldn’t keep running away from her temptation, so she refused to bolt this time.Months ago, she had invited Malcolm to what she considered their final intimate dinner. Surrounded by the restaurant’s romantic ambiance, Hallison sobbed silently as she placed the four-carat diamond ring back into his palm with a shaky hand.Begrudgingly, Malcolm accepted more than the ring. It symbolized their engagement had officially terminated and their couple status had been dissolved.Malcolm wasn’t the one who got away, but was instead the man God instructed Hallison to give away. The Lord had issued the ultimatum: Malcolm, the love of her life, or Him, the One who gave her life.Women would be waiting on the sidelines, ready to steal Malcolm’s affections with a no-option-for-his-release clause in a relationship contract. On the outside, Hallison felt she was a fool to let a good man go, but spiritually, as a self-proclaimed backslider, her salvation clock was ticking. To her, the decision was a smart move, one she couldn’t explain, except to a few church friends. God had let her know loud and clear she had to first deny herself of her fleshly desires, pick up her cross, and follow Him.How long would I have to fast until I would be spiritually strong enough to quench my craving for Malcolm’s voice, his touch, and his smothering eyes? she questioned God as she controlled her breathing to keep Malcolm from seeing how much he affected her.
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